


You Keep Me Hangin' On

by SpookHaus



Category: Last Podcast on The Left (Podcast) RPF
Genre: Angst and Feels, Friends to Lovers type deal, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, little bit of a slowburn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 03:07:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28538562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpookHaus/pseuds/SpookHaus
Summary: Their show had gone terribly and they were late checking into their hotel, Marcus doesn't think anything else can go wrong tonight until he and Ben are forced to share a bed.
Relationships: Ben Kissel/Marcus Parks
Comments: 4
Kudos: 17





	You Keep Me Hangin' On

In their early days of touring, when they couldn’t afford to get separate hotel rooms all the time, the Last Podcast crew had quickly figured out that Ben and Henry were incapable of being roommates after their bickering had almost gotten them kicked out of two Comfort Inns in a row. From then on Marcus would room with Ben and Travis with Henry whenever they absolutely had to share rooms, it worked out well for everyone most of the time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They had just wrapped up a show in Portland where it seemed like everything that could go wrong went wrong. They had been late getting to the venue, lighting cues were off and it felt like they never hit their stride with the audience. It was late when they finally got to their hotel, everyone was irritable and more than a little drunk.

Sprawled across a large armchair in the lobby, Marcus covered his eyes with an arm to shield them from the bright fluorescent lights above. Travis was supposed to be checking them in but it seemed to be taking longer than usual. More than anything, he just wanted to get into the room, shower, crawl into bed and try to forget the night. Every minute issue and awkward moment they had had during the show was flashing through his mind and the numerous beers he had drunk weren’t helping to lessen his anxiety. He knew they were still new to national touring and they would work things out eventually, they had done great live shows on their home turf after all. But it didn’t stop him from worrying that everything they had worked so hard to build up until this point would vanish.

Shaken from his depression spiral by the volume of Travis’ voice increasing, Marcus reluctantly uncovered his face and looked towards the front desk. Their producer was gesturing wildly and kept pointing at something on his phone. _Of course, why wouldn’t something else be going wrong_ , Marcus groaned internally as he sat up and started moving slowly towards the group. Henry seemed to be backing Travis up, staring down the flustered clerk, whereas Ben was off to the side scrolling on his phone. 

As he approached Henry turned to include him in the huddle; he looked like he needed to find a bed as soon as possible. 

“Looks like they fucked up our reservation, we were supposed to have four rooms but they gave them away ‘by accident’. Something about some fucking wedding party, I don’t fucking know. They just told Travis they found two rooms to put us in though.” The shorter man grumbled. 

“So what’s the problem? We’ve shared rooms before, it’ll be the same deal as always.”

Travis turned around to face him, voice still a little tense. “They only have a room with two Queens and one with a King so someone’s going to have to share a bed.”  
“Okay” Marcus looked over at Ben leaning up against the wall listlessly, still on his phone, and back to Henry and Travis; both frankly looked dead tired. “You guys take the two beds, Sasquatch and I will share. I bet he won’t even notice me.”

Travis threw him a grateful look and turned back to the clerk to finish the check in. Glancing around to find where he had left his bag, Marcus met Ben’s eyes. The expression on the other man’s face was hard to read; he couldn’t tell if Kissel was annoyed, tired or some other mystery emotion he wasn’t able to figure out.

“You good, man?”

The tall man grunted and gave a nod. “Yeah dude, let’s just go to bed. I’m fucking exhausted.”

Marcus nodded, bending to toss his duffle bag over his shoulder and hide the heat that was spreading across his cheeks. He chalked that and the clenching in his stomach to the excess of alcohol in his system. It would all pass once he took a shower and got some rest.

Once the room keys had been passed out, they parted ways with Henry and Travis whose room was on the ground floor, and made their way up to the third floor of the hotel. The elevator ride was quiet and as soon as they got in the room, Marcus made a beeline for the bathroom.

A long, steamy shower helped stop the throbbing in his head and sober him up slightly. By the time he exited the bathroom in just his briefs and an old band shirt, Ben was already sprawled out, snoring away on top of the bed with all the lights on. _Maybe he was trying to wait up for me_ , Marcus mused but it was more likely the other man had passed out as a result of all the beers he had pounded after the show. At least he had managed to get his shoes off but he was otherwise still fully dressed. 

“Alright, you tall freak, let's go. What would you ever do without me.” Marcus grumbled, wrestling the blankets from under Ben in an attempt to cover him. Finally turning off the lights, he hopped under the covers and felt sleep overcoming him almost immediately. Despite the size of the bed, he could feel the heat radiating off of the other man’s sleeping form, finding it oddly soothing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s only a few hours later when Marcus feels himself groggily waking. The alcohol and stress must really be doing a number on his system and it takes him a moment to achingly become aware of his surroundings. The twinges of an oncoming hangover creating a surreal layer over the world. 

The sudden recognition that there is a body pressed against his back startles him before he remembers the sleeping situation they had been forced into. Kissel must be an active sleeper because not only has he rolled all the way over from his side to spoon him but he’s also managed to trap both of Marcus' legs under just one of his. The large man had abandoned his jeans at some point in the night at least but the once comforting body heat emanating off of him is now unbearably hot. Attempting to free himself and gain access to the cool air outside the covers, Marcus begins wiggling back and forth gently so as not to disturb the other man. Almost as soon as he starts moving, the brunette freezes.

Ben has an erection.

More specifically, Ben’s hard dick is pressed up against him and he’s been unknowingly grinding on it. They’ve all caught glimpses at what each other are “working with” but now he can literally feel just how big Ben is. A weird feeling of guilt coils in the pit of his stomach even as a heated blush is spreading across his face. But this is normal right? They’re both guys, they both get morning wood, it shouldn’t be a big deal. Marcus just needs to get some fresh air, that’ll help him calm down. It’s not like he’s purposefully trying to…

Ben shifts closer, interrupting his rapid train of thought, while rubbing the hard outline of his dick against the cleft of Marcus’ ass. They’re pressed together fully now, Ben’s arm thrown over his stomach. It feels so casual even if it is further trapping him. 

Steeling himself in pretending this fucked situation isn’t happening, Marcus begins to tentatively move again. But as soon as he tries to pull one leg free, the larger man is tightening his hold, drawing him closer while thrusting instistantly against him. It’s impossible for him to ignore what Kissel’s unconscious intentions are at this point and despite himself, Marcus feels his dick responding with a few interested twitches. 

Blaming it on the fact it’s been months since he’s gotten laid and how on edge the stress of planning this tour has made him. His body’s desire for touch is nothing more than a by-product of the chemicals and alcohol rushing through his system and not directly related to the fact his best friend is humping him like a body pillow. Any hope of being able to disassociate peacefully is dashed when he feels warm breath tickling his ear and a large hand traveling down to rest above his groin, Ben’s body effectively wrapped around and trapping him. The confusing mix of emotions and blood rushing to different body parts has him feeling lightheaded. Somehow through two layers of cloth, Marcus feels Ben’s shaft brush close to his hole; the volume of the sound wrenched from his throat catches him off guard and he freezes as he feels the man at his back finally stirring awake.

The pounding in his head is deafening and Marcus prays Ben didn’t hear exactly what woke him and he can pretend he’s still asleep. Hey, maybe he’ll even take a look at the awkward position he’s gotten _himself_ into and roll away to leave Marcus alone. Unfortunately, luck doesn’t seem to be on his side tonight.

“ _Hng_ Marcus?”

Ben’s voice is deeper than usual, rough with sleep. Marcus hopes he can’t feel how stiff his back just went but with their current proximity that’s probably impossible. Any second now he expects Ben to roll away from him in disgust or apology. He’s prepared to start apologizing himself, although he’s not even sure what he has to be sorry about, when he feels the hand that had previously been lying limp coming to life, moving to hold him around his waist. The larger man’s hips give a tentative roll against him. 

“Marcus.” 

The breath ghosting across his neck makes him shiver and Marcus finds himself pushing back in response. They stay like that for a moment, rocking back and forth slightly, listening to the sound of their breathing sync and grow heavier. Marcus can’t believe how worked up he’s getting just from some light touching 

“ ‘s this okay?” 

Is this okay? They’re both undoubtedly still “under the influence”. Plus Ben has never, ever before indicated that he’s interested in being with Marcus let alone a man. In fact, he’s actually made quite an effort to put on a front of the typical straight guy so is what he’s considering giving into okay? This wouldn’t be the first time Marcus has been with someone with a dick so in a way he has a lot less at risk than someone in Ben’s position. But it doesn’t seem like the other man particularly cares at the moment. And to be honest, neither does he. Glancing over his shoulder, it’s hard for Marcus to make out the details of the other man’s face in the darkness but he feels the movement at his back still.

“Y-yeah. Yeah, Ben, this is okay.”

It feels like he is croaking out the words, not sure if they are even audible but they must be because Ben is somehow pulling him back even tighter and both grunt in unison. The hand that had been gripping his waist begins moving lower but hovers just above where he needs so badly to be touched.

In an effort to show explicit consent or more out of desperation, at this point analyzing those feelings aren’t much of a priority, Marcus grabs Ben’s hand and moves it so the other man can feel the hardness tenting his briefs. The realization of just how large Kissel’s hands are has him bucking upwards into the warmth with a gasp. He feels Ben’s other hand tentatively play with the waistband of his briefs. Enthusiastically grinding into the touch, Marcus catches a moan in his throat as Ben pulls them down enough to reveal his ass, freeing dick in the process. 

Adjusting himself so his cock is fully pointing up in his boxers, Ben presses between the meat of Marcus’ cheeks and experimentally thrusts. What starts as soft, punched out breaths turns into a litany of moans as Ben’s bare hand returns to stroke the brunette’s weeping cock, speeding up in time with the movements of his hips. 

Marcus reaches back blindly and desperately holds onto Kissel in an attempt to not lose himself completely. He can tell neither of them is going to last long at the pace they’re going. Throwing his head back as a particular upward stroke swipes over the head of his cock, Marcus feels Ben’s face press into the crook of his shoulder and neck. 

“F-fuck, I’m close.”

His hiccuping gasp in response barely registers, every part of his body hot and tense. 

“Me...me too. _Oh fuck_ , Ben, please!”

With that Ben stills, groaning into him and shuddering. It takes only a few more passes for Marcus to join him, shooting over the large hand gripping him. They’re still twisted up in each other’s limbs, panting hard and out of it in a post-orgasm haze. 

Marcus again expects Ben to distance himself, now that the deed is done, but he’s surprised when he feels the other man move them back towards the center for the bed putting some distance between them and the cooling stain of Marcus’ release. Glad that it seems like they’re not going to have to process what just happened tonight, he feels himself blissfully drifting back to sleep. Before fully losing consciousness, Marcus thinks he feels Ben's lips pass over his shoulder in a chaste kiss. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He isn’t sure if it’s the sound of a running shower or the light streaming past the curtains they had neglected to close that wakes Marcus but the sudden consciousness feels startling. He hadn’t gotten a good look at the room before turning in, the unfamiliar surroundings adding to the confusion as his brain attempts to piece together the previous night. It’s not long before the images and feelings come rushing back and he throws off the cover to confirm that he’s indeed still partially naked from the waist down. He also notices the presence of a not so inconspicuous stain to his right. 

The physical evidence of what they did last night makes him shudder and Marcus finds himself unable to look away as his mind spirals. Okay, okay, so he and his best friend basically just mutually masturbated each other, so what? Don’t frat bros pull this shit all the time? But they probably don’t have indie podcasts that are just starting to take off to potentially ruin with a casual fling. _Fuck!_

The shower abruptly turning off breaks him from his revere. Scrambling to pull his briefs up and straighten his t-shirt, Marcus sits up cross legged in bed. Time stands still as he waits for Ben to exit the bathroom, all the while he imagines all the things he could say, all the things the other man might say. Just as he’s considering making a run for it, the door opens and the tall man steps cautiously into the room. 

Ben’s already dressed in jeans and a fresh t-shirt, a towel tossed around his shoulders that he has a death grip on. Neither says anything, just sort of glance at each other while pretending to inspect the carpet and corners of the room. Marcus is reminded of some of his old one night stands, where in the light of day you get a real good look at who you took home from the bar and have to kick them out in the nicest way. 

“Hey-”

They speak in unison and both awkwardly chuckle.

“ _Um_ , listen, about last night.” Ben starts, looking like he is intensely studying a spot on the bed just to the left of Marcus. “I’m so sorry, Marcus, I don’t know what came over me. I got so fucked up after the show, I know that’s not an excuse, and when I woke up and you were...I guess I got carried away in the moment and...” 

“Ben, it’s okay.” Marcus stops Ben’s rambling with a raised hand. “We were both drunk, sometimes shit like this just happens. You asked for consent and I gave it. It’s okay, really!” Although he doubts this is a frequent occurrence between best friends at least Ben visibly relaxes and can look at him again. “I’m not going to let it ruin things between us, not like it’ll ever happen again, right?”

 _I also don’t regret it_ , a tiny, internal voice pipes up but he chooses not to share that surprising revelation. Unsure of what that means for him and not wanting to say anything that might freak the other man out. 

“Okay. Okay, thanks Marcus.” Ben says with a small smile that the brunette returns with a nod, ignoring the odd clenching feeling in his stomach. The mood in the room is starting to feel more normal, that’s the only thing that matters. Ben turns to his suitcase and Marcus slides out of the bed to begin gathering his things as well. His attention is brought back when Ben calls his name, turning to see the expression of worry again painted on the other man’s face. There’s something else too that wasn’t there before, Marcus can see genuine fear in his friend’s eyes.

“I just wanted to say, I’m not...Marcus, I’m not-”

 _Gay?_ Marcus completes in his head, anger starting to simmer there. But just as quickly as it comes he feels himself deflating, this conversation isn’t worth having. It’s not worth explaining that you don’t have to be gay to be into men because if anyone should know that it’s Ben whose made jokes about Marcus being pan. Nothing is going to change, he just feels tired.

“I know, man. I know.” He reassures instead. Ben gives a tight lipped nod and both turn back to their bags. Marcus can’t help but notice the twisting feeling has settled again in his stomach. He pushes it down, rationalizing that he just has his wires crossed; his brain is conflating residual feelings of lust with actual attraction. 

It’s not long before they’re ready to go; Marcus throws down a couple extra bucks for the housekeeping tip, thinking about the stained sheets they’ll have to deal with. They meet back up with Travis and Henry in the lobby, neither of them seems to suspect anything has transpired between the two men. Henry starts going off on Ben for making them late (he knows Marcus would never do it on purpose and Ben is a repeat offender). Ben makes a frankly absurd joke about clocks that has Marcus cackling and Henry even more worked up. 

Coming up for air, Marcus catches Ben’s eye and the two smile at each other. They can move on from this, hell, maybe someday they’ll even be able to joke about. Not around Henry, _never_ around Henry. 

It’s easy for him not to question the sudden doubled pounding of his heart or attribute it to something else. Something that’s not in the dark corner of his mind that he’s afraid to poke at, knowing he’s not going to like the answer he finds there.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> This is my first chaptered fic and I don't really have a schedule for updating, oops  
> Comments are always appreciated and definitely motivate me :)


End file.
